That’s how old I am today. Somehow, the number seems quite a bit older than thirty-three. Maybe it’s because I always thought I really would enlist before I turned thirty-five. (The Army says I have until forty-two now I hear, though. Perhaps the Marines will make an exception?) Maybe it’s the fact that if I were to have another child (which I would absolutely love to do) I’d soon be read a whole new list of risk factors. Honestly, it’s probably just because it’s been quite a long year.
So how should I approach my waning drive to maintain my fanatical fitness reputation? My fading ambitions to divide and conquer the new, the better, the undiscovered? Am I just in a rut? Or am I really beginning on a steady decline in motivation, in vibrancy, in zeal, in life? Because I was always the girl who had another trick up her sleeve; another ace in the hole; another race to be run. But now I just seem to be the one who’s been there and done that; who’s so over it; who’s thoroughly disinterested in that level of work.
I consider my present state for a moment and I realize that none of that really even matters. Maybe I don’t need a new goal or another accomplishment. Maybe my always-thought-I-would-do-that dreams are just grass-is-greener illusions. Maybe that’s all any of my meager strivings were. Yes. When I consider the truth, I realize the absolute ubiquitous mercy and grace evidenced in my life, past, present, and future. I recognize that no matter what I’ve done, am doing, or ever will do, I am surely abundantly blessed aside from any of it. Aside from, not because of my own attempts to pacify, occupy, and distract myself.
And in that case,
maybe certainly, it is time to call off the colorless hair counting conundrum and begin counting my cosmic contentment cards.
How does He love me? Let me count the ways…
1. I was given life.
2. I was given parents – two, not one.
3. I was given parents who took me to church from the time I was born.
4. I was given a mother who did not work outside the home until I was twelve years old.
5. I was given a father who worked hard to provide and take care of me.
6. I was given an exceptionally, generally physically healthy body.
7. I was given the opportunity to go to school.
8. I was given enough intellect to comprehend the things I was taught.
9. I was given a suitor who actually wanted to marry me.
10. I was given the opportunity to attend college.
11. I was given the freedom to choose which career I wanted.
12. I was given enough food to sustain me.
13. I was given clothing.
14. I was given a home in which to live.
15. I was given a job when I was in need in high school.
16. I was given a better job when I graduated college.
17. I was given the best job in the world when I had children.
18. I have been given a good husband who loves and provides for our family.
19. I have been given a car and a really awesome bike to drive. And a dirt bike. And a road bike. And a mountain bike. Did I mention I like bikes?
20. I have been given the ability to run.
21. I have been given the ability to swim.
22. I have been given the ability to write.
23. I have been given the privilege to teach my own children.
24. I have been given another birthday and another year to live.
25. I have been given the privilege to serve my husband.
26. I have been given an awesome church.
27. I have been given an awesome pastor.
28. I have been given a live-in mom who always helps me.
29. I have been given a beautiful, intelligent, sweetest ever little girl named Maylee Ruth.
30. I have been given a beautiful, intelligent, sweetest ever little girl named Addie Elaine.
31. I have been given a beautiful, intelligent, sweetest ever little girl named Mia Jane.
32. I have been given a really hot hunk of a hardworking husband named Timmy.
33. I have been given the greatest possession ever imagined – a Bible.
34. I have been given eternal life from the best friend anyone could ever have: Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.
Now. All that can only mean one thing…whatever I do not get to do or be or have or experience is a mere novelty in light of what I have been given. I live an extreme reality – a life of irrational blessing. Am I so dull? Ashamedly, most days I am. But today is my birthday. From one who ever refers to herself as a little girl, I will remember the reasons I must celebrate.
Happy October 30. Don’t forget to count your blessings.